On paper, my life sounds so impressive. I just finished editing the latest book “Planning Your Wedding Sucks” (due out in Fall) and I’ve been meeting with producers and network executives trying to sell the Sucks series as a TV show. On one end, I have Mary Jo Eustace to host “Divorce Sucks,” (think “Supernanny” for the dumped and degraded), and on the other, I have the whole Sucks series where each show would focus on a different sucky subject (dating, dieting, unemployment, marriage etc.). But as exciting as all this may sound, the reality is all I am, is officially unemployed. Sure, the thought of selling a TV show is great, but I can only think of it as a hobby. Every so often I get to wear matching clothes and big girl shoes and head outside the comforts of the two mile radius of my home. I valet park and take the elevator up to the network floor where a nice lady asks me if she can get me anything to drink while I wait (oh, how long been since anyone cared about what I need!). I’m escorted to a conference room where important people actually listen to what I have to say without asking me to cut their meat or demand to watch iCarly before starting their homework. It’s like dress up for the stay-at-home mom crowd! After the meeting I turn back into a pumpkin as I race through rush hour traffic to pick up my kid who berates me for packing Danimals in her lunch when she’s told me countless times how much she hates Danimals. Then its off to take disgruntled kid to art class, home to walk the dog and start dinner, and a frantic search for the white button-down shirt for my daughter’s glee concert performance that night only to find that it’s bundled in a dirty ball in the back of her closet. True, trying to sell these TV shows may be just a hobbie, but oh, how an umemployed girl needs her hobbies. Keep your fingers crossed that one of these shows go so I can wear my big girl shoes every day and my 12 year old can pack her own damn lunch! And maybe even mine!
I had to let you know that Teenagers Suck has been a life-saver for me. I have four kids – 16, 14, 11, 9 – and I immensely dislike the oldest right now. Your book was sent to me at Columbus Parent Magazine and I read it cover to cover, which I never do.
Since then, I’ve referred to it a bajillion times, have earmarked pages and literally read to my teenager straight from the book. My favorite line is “Whatever doesn’t kill you, makes you bleed internally.”
Now that I’ve fawned your ear off, I also wanted to let you know that I’m reviewing it in our all-teen issue coming out Feb. 1. Keep doing what you’re doing. It makes a difference. And saves my sanity (the very little I have left).
Yes, Christmas Sucks! And nothing will make you feel okay about your distain for this most sacred holiday more than this book! Learn how to deal with budget breaking presents to nasty mall Santas to bumper-to-bumper holiday travel to opinionated in-laws and drunken parties and much, much more! This Christmas classic will get your in the ho-ho-holiday hating spirit!
Click here to watch Mary Jo on Good Morning America this morning chit-chatting about Divorce Sucks! Not only was she eloquent, but she had an amazing hair day as well!
*Update: And here’s a link to the Bonnie Hunt show. Click on VIDEOS to see Mary Jo in motion!
Oh, and let’s not forget the first of two appearances on the Joy Behar show!
Many people have been asking me when they can expect to see Mary Jo dishing about divorce. Because the book was originally supposed to be released mid October (amazon got it a few weeks early…oops!), that’s when the publicity officially begins. Good Morning America wanted an exclusive first sit down with Mary Jo, so everything is set to go after that! After GMA next Tuesday, the 20th, Mary Jo will then shoot interviews for Access Hollywood, Inside Edition, The Joy Behar Show, Extra and others. Then comes The Bonnie Hunt Show and Dr. Phil back in L.A. Oh, and look for her this week in People magazine. I’ll update with more specifics soon, but for now, the publicity bandwagon officially starts rolling next Tuesday with Good Morning America!!!
I was surprised as anyone to see Divorce Sucks as the central focus of the last two Star magazines. But even though these articles boosted book sales, I don’t want to mislead anyone. True, there are many stories about Tori and Dean sprinkled throughout the book, but the reason they’re there isn’t to be vindictive or seek revenge. They’re there because Mary Jo is telling her personal journey on her own “divorce cruise” where both Tori and Dean were found front and center, sometimes even steering the ship. In every other book in the Sucks series, you’ll hear personal stories as well as they relate to the topic at hand (pregnancy, dating, dieting, menopause, Christmas, and many others). And like all the other books in the series, Divorce Sucks is, and always will be, an empowering book to help women who are going through an incredibly sucky time in their lives and learn how come out of it a wiser and better person.
So, if you want to buy Divorce Sucks to hear about Mary Jo’s first tumultuous meeting with Tori, or to read about how Dean broke Mary Jo’s heart while she wearing in a bikini (a difficult moment for any woman all on its own!), be my guest. But if you’re looking for a way to survive your own “divorce cruise,” I’m sure you’ll find it far more rewarding.
I have a series of Sucks books. It started years ago when I hated being pregnant and wanted to write a book that said it’s okay to have 9 months of blech instead of 9 month of bliss. I called it “Pregnancy Sucks.” It became a best seller and led to all the other 11 books in the Sucks Series (see title names above). But when it came time to write “Divorce Sucks” I couldn’t do it. Although there have been plenty of times I kicked the idea of divorce around in my head (especially during playoff season), I’ve never actually been divorced. I thought of asking my friend Mary Jo (otherwise known as the woman whose husband left her for Tori Spelling) to write it, but I figured there’d be a 90% chance she’d say no. Selfishly she’d be the ideal author (she’s funny and smart and has an amazing story to share) but I didn’t think she was ready to tell her tale. So I crossed my fingers and made the call and lo and behold, she said yes!! And boy, was I right! Mary Jo wrote an amazing book that’s the perfect blend of a helpful guide to divorce with just enough juicy tidbits of her own story to keep you laughing and crying. Like all the other books in the Sucks series, this book is helpful, humorous, commiserating and consoling. So if you’re thinking about, getting, or trying to get over, a divorce, it’s the perfect book for you! And of course, there are those juicy tidbits to read along the way!